Tuesday, June 28, 2011


Upon looking through drafts of posts I've created, I glanced through one which I believed was posted. I thought about adding to it yet I've moved on slightly from the thought I was wanting to write about.


Since the latter portion of 2009, I've read more books in one set period than ever in my life... unless I count the mountains of comics I use to be a fan of.  I've always wanted to be a reader, but I'm a professional procrastinator.  The two don't mix well. 

Last year when my mom passed, reality was unbearable. I didn't want to focus on the realities I was going through, so I would open up a book and live through someone else's life. I'd experience their own pains, loss, heartache, tears, laughter, deaths, and  general lessons for living. Through reading, I was able to find reflection in my own life also which has helped me to heal.  I don't know how I chose the right line of books to help me along, but every one I chose for a while was exactly what I needed to hear for that exact moment.  Since then, I've been in love and have expanded my genre of interest as well.

The first 2 books I read have really impacted me through some of the initial pain. They are Cold Mountain by Charles Frazier and the Joyluck Club by Amy Tan. I've already written about the passage in Cold Mountain that helped me with my grief, but I'll quote a small portion again, "All your grief hasn't changed a thing.... You're left with only the scars to mark the void. All you can do is go on or not. But if you go on, it's knowing you carry the scars with you."  I still feel those scars, but I'm still going on.
With the Joyluck Club, June Woo is one of several main characters and she is learning how to find herself after the loss of her mother. The book is like several different stories that are all connected and woven together so gracefully, so completely, in the end. June's mother, Sunyuan, had one unfinished task before her death that her friends have strived to complete. The completion of the goal helps June to find healing in the process.  On my side, reading how someone else was dealing with the loss of their mother was a much needed experience.  I was a lot closer my mom then June was with hers, but getting into someone else's mind on our shared event gave me a greater perspective.

One other outlet that has helped me is writing.  Thank you, ENG 101, for all the writing I had to do!  I became very involved in keeping up a journal before all this happened, so going back home and having those days I drifted around my mother's house after she passed, my journal and pen were some of my best companions.  I'm just an amature, but writing has become a passion.  It has also helped me to appreciate literature as well.

All the time one has to spend on creative writing and the buildup of character and the initial stories. 
My new found passion for the writing has helped broaden my perspectives and experiences in ways I've not thought would happen in such a small amount of time. Reading has also helped me get through the deep pain of losing my mother.

I couldn't be by myself because I would unravel.  I did anything to keep my mind occupied, but the only activity that truly helped me was to lose myself in someone else's story through a book.

Sunday, June 26, 2011


http://youtu.be/qHm9MG9xw1o This song has been my inspiration the past three days. I thought I'd share it with you. It's so easy to keep ourselves hidden and isolated out of fear of others, yet I've found that being a completly open and honest person makes me feel my best. I wanted to share the video on here, but it won't allow me to so I'm posting a link.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

New Love:Kayaking

As I opened my eyes and listened to the alarm chiming for me to break out of sleep today, I awoke to realise the reality of an agreement I had made the day before. Yesterday when I woke up I would have never imagined what I would be doing today. It wasn't till after I had gotten off work for the evening that I received a call from a friend asking me something I thought was kind of spontaneous (at least for me) and thrilling. I was asked to go kayaking. Never have I been (I've not done alot apparently from all my 1st time posts) yet I was willing to give it a try.  The rest of the evening I was excited to go on a new adventure and explore something different.

 Reality smacked me in the head as I was laying in bed this morning, my heart's tempo increased slightly and my mind began to fill with a few what ifs. What if I tipped over and drowned due to not being able to get out? What if I got hit by a barge? What if I fell out and got swept away by some strong undertow in the Columbia and drowned? These weren't strong fears, yet they were something I contemplated for a moment at best a second time while we arrived to our destination.

As I was suited up and slipped in to my kayak, apprehensions were alleviated as I situated myself to this unique setting in the water. "Think of doing the hula to keep your balance" a staff reminded me, "and relax." I made this my mantra a few times and herein began my adventure along the Scappoose Bay and my new found love for kayaking.

My friend Brian relaxing for a moment along the bay.

I was hoping to capture a few pictures of the huge birds nesting in the tops of these trees. Staff said it was the first time in 10 yrs there has been access to this area by kayak due to the river being so high.

I thought it'd be cool to have a picture of this.

This is where we went.

I found this humorous.

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Saturday, June 18, 2011

Reader Mark

I have a growing list of books I would like to someday say I've read ranging from biographies to classics, sci-fi, history, and modern novels. To help get my ever staggering goal accomplished, I've made a list of books to have done before the summer. Some of my choices are notoriously long like The Count of Monte Cristo yet others should be easily read in a day as in The Life of Pi. I've even thrown in some Ricky Martin as the bio. Yeah, I like Livin' La Vida Loca. Perhaps as I finish each one I'll write my thoughts about each of them.
Here is where I am going to start.

Purgatorio, hmm. I wonder what that's about. ;)

The end of the divine comedy.

I've actually already started this one but looked down at the fine print an saw I've been reading an abridged version. Perhaps I'm uppity, but I don't like reading anything abridged if I can help it. No matter how boring some of those other details are, I want to read them b/c the author put them there. Until I find an unabridged copy I'm reading Dante. I was really enjoying Monte Cristo too.

Neil Gaiman is an incredible author. I've enjoyed other works from him. Some have been from my early teens like his Sandman series. Those stories kind of weirded me out at times.

Sue me. I like Ricky Martin. :P

Everyone I know who has read it says it's a good read. We shall see.

I bought this book b/c of the hilarious title and cover. I hope if proves to be as funny as it looks.

Book 1 of 3. I'm excited to see more of Dax although I enjoyed the character more with its former host, Jadzea.

Yes. Another epic... I hope I can make time for this one too.

Here are a few of my ever increasing collection of books.

Here are even more. This isn't even all I have, but it is most of it. I've probably read 20% of the books in this bookcase. Forgive the poor lighting quality.  
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Friday, June 17, 2011

The Betta Collective

Tuesday, Kyle bought a new betta he named Targ who only after 4 hours in his tank plummeted to his death by jumping out and landing on the ground below. I was the one to make the gross discovery when I noticed no fish was in the guy's new home. After searching, I found him already dried to the floor which required me to work a little harder to get the little guy up. The next day, feeling let down about Targ's death (stupid fish), we decided to go out and get another one yet modify the water level in hopes of preventing a repeat of the previous suicide. While searching through Pet Works, I got betta fever and decided I wanted a new one as well. So far, I've has much success in keeping a betta alive for almost a year. Why not get another one? BTW, Kyle felt that he should be able to name the second one he bought Targ since he only had him for a few hours. lol I wish I took a pic of Targ 1 before he went ker-splat.

 We're going with a Star Trek theme for them.  We should call them all Klingon names due to their fierce nature yet we didn't go that route. Below are 3 photos of the fish in the roster. Romulus is the one I've had the longest.
This is Bettazoid. He's a Crown Tail and is one of two new bettas purchased today. His name comes from the the people who live on the planet Bettazed who are called Betazoid. Yes... I am being a nerd with my betta names. lol
http://memory-alpha.org/wiki/Betazoid This is my favorite of him. Cool little guy.

This is the other new betta named Targ as in the Klingon companion/prey on their home world Kronos! :) He is a Dragon Scale betta. http://memory-alpha.org/wiki/Targ

This is Romulus like the planet. lolHe has recently had a name change from Domingo. It didn't fit the S.T. theme and he doesn't know his name. I think it's ok. ;)  Romulus is a real planet in space, yet in the world of ST, it's the home world of the Romulans. ;) I've had this guy for almost a year now. He's done pretty good. In case you were wondering, he is a Veil Tail betta. http://memory-alpha.org/wiki/Romulus

Thursday, June 16, 2011

I Feel Like Paolo Nutini

Yesterday I bought my second pair of running shoes ever. Due to sentimental reasons it was hard to let go of the first ones. The reason they mean something is kind of apparent. They represent a part of the chapter in my healthy/fit lifestyle.  I realised this change is needful after my last run where I left feeling pain in my left foot. The bottoms are starting to wear down and the cushioning I need isn't as predominant anymore. There's been alot of miles put on my trusty shoes that's for sure. I think these new pair will do just fine though. Actually, I was jsut getting ready for my first run in them when I though I should make a post about it.

There's been alot going on in my life. I'll have to post more about it the next chance I get. I'll have alot more photos to share as well. Till next time. Oh, btw there is a link to the video of Paolo Nutini's New Shoes vid down below for your enjoyment.

The old.
The new! They're Adidas which is always a plus I think.